Tuesday, February 7, 2012

The Party Continues



We are having a wild, exhausting, time.  Sarah is like a two year old – she must be watched at all times.  She’s into everything, touches everything, and has no sense of danger.  She’s very smart – but impulsive and hyper.  She’s unable to sit for any period of time – even through a movie.  She’s whining after 10 min. of Barbie that she wants Dora to play.  Like an ADHD kid. 


She eats continuously – and it’s not from a lack of food by the size of her.  She’s a solid kiddo and fits well into our neighbors bigger sized pants.  She wears a 6- 6x, but has tiny size 12 feet.  Most of the pretty clothes I brought with me are too small. 


As I type this, she’s pushing the buttons on my computer- with hands full of skittle, cookies on the side – right after lunch.  She generally has 3 drinks open at once – and it’s hard to keep her from the craziness as when I go to the bathroom she gets into stuff. 

I bought Rachel a Lego set, and she is busy at work with headphones in – she needs the break after chasing Sarah for me all morning while I skyped home.  She has even exhausted Jenny – who is laying on the sofa watching Chinese Barbie.  I’m hoping this is all nerves – but she will definitely be enrolled in high energy sports of some sort when we get home, lol!


We ventured out to Walmart today and bought all kinds of things to keep the girls occupied – like puzzles and playdough.  I’ll show her how to do the puzzles after the movie – but it’s hard to keep her focused on any task.


We had a dance party this morning which she thoroughly enjoyed, and God has provided the energy I need so far.  She is really exhausts all who are around her – but she is a cutie – which keeps people smiling – most of the time…


She is already reading, and they tell me she’s very smart.  She loves to sing and dance – and wash her hands.  She does that about 50 times a day – which works for me! 

As wild as she is, she did stay close in the Walmart , for which I was MOST thankful to God!!   Our guide is far away today with 3 families traveling about 4 hours north.  So we’ve been doing our best with hand signals and charades.  So far, it’s working!

Please pray that I will know when to draw the line and where – and that Sarah will calm down and not wear all the girls out!!  The upside is that Jenny has become the best big sister, and has calmed down herself!  She is speaking quietly already – and guiding her sister as best as she knows how.  Oddly enough, she is my interpreter – even though she speaks no English!! She knows what I’m conveying – and tells her sister in Chinese.  It’s very interesting how it’s all working out.


Last but not least, we watched fireworks all night out our window – bigger than any 4th of July celebration!  It was amazing!  Again - the girls weren't interested - but Rachel and I enjoyed it! 

 Please pray for a calming of Sarah's spirit - Rachel just asked, "what happens when we go to Church?"  I've never had a wild one like this - and I'm hoping the behavior is a result of all the stress she's under as she's made a big transition.  Huge.  She is an adorable girl - but absolutely cannot be still - not even for a few seconds. She's standing about 5 inches from the big TV right now - sewing a little craft, watching the TV, working the remote, and hopping around all at the same time.  I'd love some advice as to how to direct her or keep her focused - or just let it go as a temporary PTSD of sorts. One hopeful sign - the spitting has stopped - PTL!!! For those who know my germaphobe self - this is such a blessing.  To make her happy, I've eaten about 50 offered strawberry ritz cracker oreo things, chocolate topped mushroom cookies (they were pretty good) and other assorted shrimp flavored chips, etc.  I finally took the 10th box of snacks away from her as it was getting GROSSLY disgusting how much she was eating and I'm afraid she'll throw up.  She has not been starved - she has been spoiled.  I'm debating canceling the trip to the orphanage tomorrow - even though I'll be meeting foster mama.  I'm not impressed with the parenting job to be quite honest.  Could just be Sarah - could be the training - can't figure it out.   Keep praying - I'll pay it back, I promise.  God is hearing as even though she's challenging, it's really driving Jenny to me for respite, lol!  God works in mysterious ways - and He always knows what he's doing.  Love reading the comments and advice - I check the email constantly as it is a Lifeline here.
 
Love you all!  Kim

11 comments:

  1. Aaawww...Kim....that's so tiring. A lot of that could just be the way she is handling the stress. I've read lots of reports from parents saying their older kiddos acted like this (it's how a child 3,4 or 5 might act and many of these kiddos are behaviorally way behind). Tessa did a lot of it (climbed in the furniture in the hotel, pulled out a so-not-ready-to-come-out molar, ran off when I stopped to talk to someone). Remember when we met you there...you all were going places and eating in restaurants...our time was very different due to our girl. Exhausting. Sigh. At home she climbed on the furniture and the like (you may need to child-proof things for her own safety). We avoided taking her to stores for SEVERAL months because they would set her off into crazy, immature behaviors as well. She may settle down after a while home (I won't get your hopes up and suggest she will likely settle down where you are) as I've read MANY stories to suggest it's very possible. Tessa's behaviors have certainly settled, though 3 yrs later we are left with often immature and hyper-reactive behaviors. I'm trying to encourage her to get into Track and Field...she is gone before the noise of the gun stops which is a good trait in a sprinter (not so good in a family though!) Just think of your remaining time there as a workout that ends with the longest plane ride of your life!! :) Prayers for endurance...for you and the other girls.

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  2. You just described the Asher that we got in China. The constant motion, he darted everywhere, he touched everything, pushed/pulled every button, talked non-stop, was all about food and would shove it in his mouth non-stop as if he had not eaten in days. He was so spoiled! He would run from us if he saw something he wanted. He would pitch a fit if he didn't get what he wanted. One thing I would do is put the snacks away. Start to limit her sugar and junk intake. All refined flours, chemicals and sugar are just making it worse. The sugary juices too. Sounds like she is a little beyond Asher, but it also sounds like some of this is a type of PTSD. Asher got a lot better after we left his province and had an about face, in many ways when we left China. He's still high energy, but not hyper. He will still stuff his mouth with food, and even sneak it, but shows signs of some self control and is learning everyday. He's attention span has grown from nil to about 15 minutes (for something like school) or much longer for tv, movies, video games, and toys he likes! I think a lot of it is stress. I think some of it is just Sarah. :) My 2 cents.

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  3. Your girls are amazing, and you are an amazing Mom! I would go and meet foster mama - it would be priceless to see how she behaves in familiar territory so you'll know what ot expect once she settles at home, which may take months. Praying!!!

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  4. You are doing great Kim. Rest up. I agree with Lori, the sugary snacks need to go. They are not helping the crazy factor- behaviorally or nutritionally. LOL Angie

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  5. In addition to my earlier comment of FB - - don't worry about the "church behavior" - - - you can just tell the curious (nosey) onlookers that she is "spirit-fill" & perhaps she was exposed to the "holy-rollers" - - LOL - just trying to make you smile -- Hang in there, I know it's tough, but God won't give you anything you can't handle! Blessings to all!

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  6. I would have NEVER guessed that Sarah would be such a handful!! NEVER! But as you said, it is a blessing in disguise that Sarah's activity level has sort of "humbled" Jenny!! That's funny! And I love the photo of you and Jenny together...so sweet. Perhaps it is just Sarah's nerves. Our prayers are with you!

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  7. Kim~ I can feel your emotions as I read half a world away! Praying for you as you fall asleep in China. I remember feeling much like this in our first few days with Rachel... Nothing held her attention and she jumped from one activity to another without fully engaging in any of it. I was afraid to take my eyes off of her and worried that maybe I'd bitten off more than I could chew! And speaking of church... our first service was a bit nightmarish, as she did not seem capable of sitting still for that long. I was pretty firm with her and she responded with tears. Be encouraged, though... I think she was overwhelmed and overstimulated and felt so incredibly out of control. Today she can play quietly, concentrate on school and games and even enjoys a TV show sometimes! She sits through church like a champion and is better behaved than 99% of the kids around her! Sarah will calm down as her new life becomes more "normal". In the meantime, we'll pray for a heavy dose of stamina for YOU! My only suggestion is CAFFEINE! It would be worth a try anyway! If there is any ADHD at play in her... the stimulant might help create the calm you need... Do they sell Mountain Dew in China? :-) Hugs from Florida, Lori McCary

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  8. Kim, I'm praying hard for you to keep up, have wisdom, and to love well ;)!! One of my fellow moms of a high energy girl started her swimming and she has been our state champ since she was 7 or 8 lol!

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  9. Kim - I laughed and cried as I read your post!! Given that I am also in the "thick" of things with an almost 2 year old and a 3 year old and I know how sometimes I am fearful of what I might find when I open the door after I go potty myself, I am feeling your challenges!! (only you don't have the blessing of speaking the same language and you are confined to a hotel room and this little bundle of energy has just started to know you as Momma!) Dear Lord, thank you so much for Kim! I love her heart for these precious girls that you created to be hers and Perry's! Dear God, please give her wisdom as she makes parenting decisions with these girls! Lord, supernaturally whisper to her how to speak, act, and love these girls to meet their deep needs right now! Help her to guide them in a way that gives them boundaries, but is also sensitive to what they are going through! Lord, thank you for your provision!! Thank you that in weakness we see Your Strength! Thank you that in our insufficiency, you show your complete adequacy! Please bless this family!! In Jesus' name, amen
    Love, Jenni

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  10. As a teacher, we sometimes have very rough days when an ADD/ADHD student does not take his/her medication. With some of the kids, caffeine has the reverse affect on their brain chemistry as it does on the average person. So, a can of caffeinated pop can actually have a calming (increased focus) effect on some ADD/ADHD kids. I don't know if that will work for Sarah, but it is a thought. Congratulations on finally getting to meet your two newest kiddos, they are both cuties!

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  11. I feel for you! Please don't cancel your trip to see her foster family. You might gain valuable insite into her behavior. You can also ask them how they handled her? Has she been to school? Don't be afraid to have her practice sitting still for a few minutes at a time, especially right next to you. REALLY limit her stimulation and sweet snacks. Turn off the TV, dim the lights, etc... How is she sleeping? It's a great sign that she stayed next to you in the store. I'm glad you've maintained your strength, but I imagine you'd love a break about now!

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